GROW WITH SARAH GRACE

There are very few moments in my life when I am truly speechless — you can ask anyone who knows me to confirm that. I was born to yap, but right now, I am at a loss for words. I truly don’t know if I can put into words what the past year of my life in Paris has meant to me but I will try my hardest. 

To be honest, I kept putting this piece off because I wanted to do my year in Paris justice. I don’t think I ever will because the experiences I had in that short time will always hold the most special place in my heart. They were so magnificent that I think no amount of writing could summarize them perfectly.

I finally realized after writing a million and one drafts and deleting so many words that I will never actually get off the peak that was Paris. I will never find the “right” words because I’ll always think of something new to say once this is published but for now, I want to say that it was truly life-changing. 

I used the same phrase to describe my study abroad experience where I lived in Rome for 5 months. While I don’t think I was lying when I said that – I discovered that my time in Rome was certainly a lesson to learn but this time around was truly something different. 

My time spent in Rome was amazing and I could write a book about the adventures I had there but after spending a year in Paris, I can confidently say nothing will ever compare. I’m not sure if the six months in Italy felt too much like a vacation and after six months in Paris, it became real life or because this year has been the most challenging and rewarding year of my life but The City of Light will always mean so much to me. 

Whether it’s the people I met along the way, the experiences I had, the countries I traveled to or the fact that for the first time in my life, I started a new chapter completely alone – Paris is going to forever be a home to me.  

TO THE PEOPLE I MET ALONG THE WAY

When I moved to Paris, I barely knew any French with only a job to occupy me but luckily it didn’t take too long before I met some pretty amazing people. Living in a world of social media brought me some girls I will cherish for a lifetime. Who knew two Americans and a British girl could make such an impact on how my time abroad went.

To the girls I became inseparable with – thank you. You guys made the most remarkable impression on my year abroad. From late nights on Rue Princesse to wholesome museum dates to every moment in between, you ladies are truly amazing. I think in the heat of it all, we all took what we had for granted but having a solid group to explore Paris and Europe with was the best blessing. 

To my host family – I couldn’t have asked for a better family to work for. You guys took me in and were there for me during my hardships and celebrated with me during the highs. I can’t thank you enough for being so incredibly perfect. It’s comforting to know I’ll always have you guys to see in Paris. 

To the others – you know who you are – thank you. From the girl I met at school pick-up which led to a genuine friendship to the characters I met on late nights out that turned into stories to tell. But perhaps most importantly, to the person I met a little too late – thank you for everything, truly. If we had a whole year to know each other or only a few months, every person I met along the way has helped make my experience so compelling.

Each person came with a lesson – some I had to learn the hard way but no matter what the outcome may have been – I am grateful to have met them through the heartbreak and all. If I could say one thing to the special people I left behind in Paris – I want to say that you have changed me for good. You’ve allowed me to show a side of me that no one else has seen and you’ve taught me more than I thought I could learn. You will certainly be the stars of my memoir. 

TO THE PLACES I GOT TO SEE

Getting to call Paris “home” was truly the best decision I’ve ever made. I was able to see sights most people can only dream of seeing like the “Mona Lisa” on a casual Tuesday before going to work or the Eiffel Tower sparkling from my apartment window. I even got to experience a little bit of the Summer Olympics chaos. Seeing the sights and making impactful memories was great but I also had to deal with some difficult things.

In the most horrific scene of deja vu, I was sitting in my apartment in Paris when I got the phone call. My Babci – also known as my biggest inspiration, the reason I am a writer and one of the most important people in my life – joined my Pop in Heaven. Losing two such impactful people in my life while living in Rome and Paris was not expected but it certainly made me stronger. 

When I was at the prime age of 16 – after being out of the country for the first time – I set a personal goal for myself. I wanted to see 30 countries before turning 30. If 16-year-old me knew that as of today – we’ve seen 29 countries before the age of 24, she would scream. I guess younger Sarah had no idea that she was going to have the opportunity to live abroad twice before turning 25. 

While I loved exploring Paris – I especially loved traveling to surrounding countries. This time around, I was able to see 13 new countries along with seeing new spaces in 4 previously visited countries. I got to spend Halloween in Amsterdam, show Rome to a set of virgin eyes, run around London with some locals I get to call my friends, spend Thanksgiving in a cabin in Normandy and a hot summer weekend in Nice.

I fought a windstorm in Belgium, ate Burek for the first time (and fell in love with it) in Croatia, dealt with border control in Montenegro for a short day trip and even enjoyed delicious hot cocoa in Scotland. After my mom missed her flight to meet me in Denmark, I took a solo trip to Copenhagen and even got to cross the Sweden border to try genuine Swedish candy for the first time. I finally made my way to Portugal where I explored a small town with a childhood friend and got to take a road trip with my family to see Germany and Luxembourg. 

During my visit to Nice, I hopped over to Monaco a week after the big Charles Leclerc F1 win, and to cap off my year, I went on an Eastern European trip with my mom. I got to admire a sunset in Slovakia, was in awe over the Parliament Building in Budapest, took a day trip to a small town in Romania and even got to see every corner of Prague on foot.

PARIS, THIS ISN’T GOODBYE.

I want to start this conclusion by saying a huge thank you to my family. I know allowing your only daughter and sister to live 4,000 miles away can’t be an easy task. While I’m sure you appreciate a European vacation for Spring Break – it is still a hassle to contact an international number everyday. 

I want to say thank you for always supporting my dreams. I will say it until the day I die – you guys are the best support system I could have. You allow me to take the biggest leaps with grace and I am never afraid because I know if I fall, you’ll be there to catch me.

Alright, now let’s wrap this bad boy up – I’m sure you’re ready to close this tab. I started writing this piece at one of my favorite cafes in Paris in late July – right before I said goodbye to Paris. 

I never finished it and still felt my heart lingering towards Paris. I couldn’t bring myself to close that chapter in my life. 

I left Paris behind in August but I felt like I had some unresolved feelings and I just didn’t think my story was over yet. I took one more leap of faith and decided to go back to Paris one last time while in this period of my life. I wanted to give it the best farewell I could muster up.

While the trip looked a little different than planned – I still had a great time and was able to put Paris to “rest” once and for all. As the saying goes – c’est la vie. However, it was a great way to get the closure I needed.

So here I am, finishing my piece finally. If I’m being completely honest – I am terrified. Saying goodbye to Paris might be the biggest mistake I’ve ever made but it’s one that has to happen. I won’t be this young forever and it’s time to move on. Truly, if I could do my year abroad again – I would do it in a heartbeat.

It’s time for my next chapter because I’m not one to stay in one place for too long. Maybe my Paris time was cut a little too short or maybe it was just right – that’s something I’ll never know for sure. One thing I do know is that life is incredibly unpredictable.

If little Sarah knew she would not only live in Paris for a year but also fall in love and create so many memories – she would have the biggest smile on her face and that’s comforting to think about.

Maybe this isn’t goodbye Paris. Maybe I’ll find myself in your alleyways again but for now – it’s time for the scary part. The transition to my next location. While I am petrified, I know I have the support of amazing people from around the world and for that, I’m grateful. 

So to Paris – I’m going to miss you and the people I’m leaving behind. But it brings me peace to know that this city is going to miss me and that you’ll always be there for me to return when I need it. Until next time, Paris.

With (so much) love,

Sarah Grace